Caregivers Are Humans Too: How To Care For Yourself And Be A Caregiver
When someone in your family or inner circle get’s sick, there is often an expectation that you will care for them. No questions asked. That is the beauty of having family and friends, right? Caregiving can be a beautiful thing that brings people together, but as emotional and physical demands increase, caregivers begin to experience increased stress and an inability to cope.
Being a caregiver for someone with chronic illness has changed tremendously over the last several decades. With the discovery of new medical technology and new treatments, many patients are living longer lives with chronic conditions. This is an amazing thing. But it also means that illnesses are not necessarily shortening the lifespan, but rather complicating it, causing caregivers to take on new, stress inducing roles for long periods of time. Caregivers are taking on new roles often for an entire lifetime.
There are a substantial amount of resources for individuals with chronic illness. Following diagnosis most of the attention revolves around this person; they are the sick ones. But, what about the caregivers? Who cares for you?
Caregiving for someone with chronic illness comes in many forms.
Whether you are caring for a loved one financially from miles away, offering emotional support daily, or driving them to doctor’s appointments, caregiving for someone with chronic illness can be overwhelming.
Caregivers are often responsible for:
driving to appointments
spending hours in waiting rooms or hospitals
listening to doctors meet with their loved ones
researching medications and treatment protocols
being an advocate
explaining to their supervisors about taking extra time off from work
filling out complicated paperwork
talking to insurance representatives
sharing the financial burden
sacrificing their time for caregiver duties
The typical caregiver spends about 20 hours a week on caregiving duties. That is the equivalent of a part time job. It’s a a lot.
Regardless of age, sex, race, or ethnicity, caregivers unanimously report problems taking care of their own health while managing caregiving responsibilities. This leads to caregivers:
sleeping less
eating poorly
failing to exercise
not resting when they’re sick
putting off medical appointments for themselves
Studies show that an estimated 46% to 59% of caregivers are clinically depressed, ouch. Perhaps the most striking finding about caring for someone with chronic illness is that there is a tendency for the partner’s quality of life to be worse than that of the chronically ill patient. This particular study focused on partners and spouses, but I’m certain that these findings would be similar if we looked at different types of relationships. This means that caregivers are often experiencing worse mental health conditions, and possibly worse physical conditions, than the individual they are caring for.
Tired, overwhelmed caregiver, does this sound like you?
Caregivers need three main things to survive: emotional support, essential resources, and wellness activities. In the Caring for the Caregiver Workbook we cover:
how to get your needs met
how to ask for help
how to communicate effectively with medical staff
how to communicate with a chronically ill loved one